What does gender have to do with sexual orientation? The questions bigots ask again and again reveal their ignorance about the subject - and the fact that try as you may to explain it to them - even by referring them to expert sites on the matter, they just won't get it - shows contempt for diversity.
They continue to ask sarcastically "what makes gays physically different or is it a spiritual thing? Or is it a mental condition that convinces them that they are not men and women, but rather homosexual men and lesbian woman?" - So after all the long explanations - and even some really short ones - according to them a gay man is not a man? Gay people are "physically different"? LOL.
Here is the short version:
Gender identity - is how a person identifies as a person - as male or female, regardless of physical characteristics. This is how a persons innermost self is defined by the individual as either masculine or feminine - it refers to the self and not a partner - "who or what gender I see myself as".
Sexual orientation - what gender partner a person is attracted to, both emotionally and physically, regardless of their own gender. And yes a gay man is still a man and a gay woman is still a woman.
They even come up with the strangest explanations for the human condition for example "demons and so-called generational curses" cause homosexuality and transgender! LOL, how funny. Look - it's the easter bunny, oh wait - no, sorry - it was the devil travelling incognito to attend a Love Won Out conference.
They are so confused about sexuality and the sexuality of other people, they clearly have no gaydar whatsoever. In fact I am pretty certain they think clowns look gay and would share this observation with the person beside them that they would be blissfully unaware of is a drag queen.
But you have to wonder at the extent of their curiosity, especially when they ask questions like: "How do I know that the person next to me is homosexual?" I don't know, fella - I mean, is it any of your business? Honestly, the amount of interest they show in what gay people do in the privacy of their own homes makes one wonder exactly how straight they really are. Have you ever listened to the talks these people give on the "evils of homosexuality", perversion and gay sex? I mean, these folks claim to be experts on the subject, and yet they almost always get things completely wrong! You sometimes have to wonder if they have been paying their Exodus subscriptions lately - especially since every now and again a religious right leadership figure tumbles out of the closet still clinging to the hangers.
"What's dignified about having anal sex?" - Now there is a classic from the bigot - um, arsenal.
I don't know - what's dignified about sex in general? Do you gay-hating bigots keep a stiff upper lip while they're at it? Is that "dignified straight sex"? I don't know about you folks, straight, gay or any flavor of the rainbow - but I think the very LAST word that could be used to describe the act of sex - ANY KIND OF SEX - would be "dignified"?
When it comes to religious banter you just can't corner them, they are far too slippery - nope, those guys have plausible deniability and weaseling out of tight corners down to an art. When they point out biblical laws that condemn homosexuality, you point out that these are ritual laws and that the word "abomination" is used to describe homosexuality as well as something as dull as eating pork - which according to the experts does not mean you will go to hell for munching on bacon or pork chops. Homosexuality therfore according to the OT is not something serious, just not up to the standard of "ideal living". Nevertheless Christians today condemn gay and trans people while wearing a polyester suit with their mouths full of shellfish, bacon and pork chops.
They swiftly turn around in this tight spot by claiming that "Oh, the pork law was meant for the Jews, and not Christians - but homosexuality is still a sin - oh, and you will go to hell for it." Nevertheless, to me the meaning of this is quite clear. Some laws are not to be adhered to, and some are - and it seems only they reserve the right to decide whatever is convenient to stick to and what not. I get it.
So in the end it is their choice to "eat pork" and hate gay people, even though they do not have to.