Religion - The Guilt-Edged Sword

When we think of human relationships, the relationships between people, whether friendships or romances, we often come to a point where there is a parting of ways - a place where friendships stop being rewarding, when a love relationship ceases to be a love relationship and just devolves into something less. Just like a marriage where the love has exited stage left, all things end - and attempting to keep them alive artificially serves no purpose other than to drag things out to the very bitter, painful end.

Guilt shouldn't bind you to a person or trap you in a failed relationship. If it isn't love that keeps you there, but guilt - then you're both better off with someone else - or alone, because otherwise you will be doing yourself (and each other) more harm than good.

In many ways, the same thing can be said about religion.

Of Proof And Puddings

The evidence against South Africa's government as being homophobic continues to mount. 

 

Remember how it started in December 2008 when the SA government refused to sign the UN Declaration to Decriminalize Homosexuality? Well, obviously it didn't end there.

SOUTH AFRICA FAILS LGBT PEOPLE AT UN - "In February 2009, South Africa acted as spokesperson for African nations demanding the removal of references to sexual orientation from the draft declaration of the second UN World Conference against Racism, Racial Discrimination, Xenophobia and Related Intolerance." How much more proof do you need that SA's government has an anti GLBTI, anti human rights agenda?

The above article described this as "failing the GLBTI people". In my opinion this is not "failing LGBT people" - it is an outright BETRAYAL!

Out Of Focus

Has anybody taken note of what's happening in our northern neighbor Zim-BOB-we lately? 

 

Not only did they refuse to include the human rights of their pink community in the negotiations for their country's new constitution - but they are now saying they will build criminalization and punishments for homosexuality into it as well.

Can't say I'm the least bit surprised.

Sad, but true.

The Smell Of Fear

The forces who today oppose the struggle for recognition, equality and human rights of others think of themselves as strong. 

 

They stand today at the top of the pile, glorying in the lie that all people already are equal and have equal rights. 

 

They claim that those whose fingers they have spent countless years treading upon, are not fighting for equal rights, but "special rights" that will somehow elevate us above them. 

 

They look down on decades, centuries of suffering, persecution and abuse - and somehow still lack the conscience and humanity to acknowledge the sorrow, unfairness and inhumanity they have forced upon their own peers and relatives for so long - for the terrible injustice it is.

State Of Grace

Isn't it sad and funny how the worst in some people tends to bring out the best in others? Or is that the other way round? You know these people, trying to live the good life, walk the straight and narrow. The people who take it a step further, going beyond minding their own business, and starting to mind the business of others. The manic street preachers and interfering busy-bodies who think they are doing "God's work" and that the end justifies the means, no matter how messy the means.

Do we really need to listen to people telling us about how great they think their god is? I am fine with what I believe - I don't need some twat standing on a street corner with a bible in one hand and a bull-horn in the other, telling me what to believe. Who are they trying to convince? Us? Or themselves?

What other people believe doesn't really other me, except where their beliefs are acted out in such a way as to affect my safety, my rights, and my future, with the potential to ruin my life.

What other people believe shouldn't (be allowed to) hurt me.

Leave No-one Behind

We often refer to our diverse community of sexual minorities as "GLBT", including main groupings such as Gay, Lesbian (also gay), Bisexual and Transgender. 

 

Sometimes, when we feel generous - or remember to, we add on the I for Intersex. Perhaps when we run into groups that confuse us, or defy classification into the other main groups, we quickly tack on the "Q" for Queer or Questioning - although I sometimes have to wonder who it is that is doing the actual questioning? Us? Or the folks on the outside of the community? 

 

But mostly, I often wonder why is it that we as a community seem to be struggling so much with framing and understanding (or even accepting) our own diverse identities?

Sorry, I'm Hatred-Intolerant

Why do some men feel that other men being gay is somehow an affront to their masculinity? 

 

What are they so afraid of?

Their own sexuality and of falling out of the closet? That, or are they afraid gay men have bigger dicks? I know some women who have bigger balls. Oh wait, I am one.

Let a girl just choose a girl over a man, and they feel they are "less of a man" for it and get all defensive, as if it has anything at all to do with them. That's right - they seem to think that a woman's taste in men (or women) actually affects them! Geez! Talk about insecurities, issues and mental problems! ... or is that ego? Nah, try arrogance.

Accepting Diversity

I find people amazing, fascinating. 

 

Don't you think it is incredible how there are so many of us, and yet each of us is still unique as an individual? Variety is the spice of life, or so the old saying goes. We are all basically the same biological organisms, but each of us is still different and unique enough to look distinctive, and have our own lifetime of experiences that make us into unique individuals, each with our own identities, thoughts, feelings, opinions and achievements.

It is this fact that makes Human society so wonderfully diverse. And yet sometimes we get tired of people who disagree with us, or with what we feel is the "right" or "only" way to do things, sometimes this diversity frustrates us. But place us in an environment where everybody looks, sounds and lives the same way - do we not soon find ourselves longing for a touch of individuality?

Puppet Electorate

Something is still really badly wrong with our democracy in South Africa. 

 

The poorest of the poor are still frequently being intimidated into voting for particular parties - being threatened with their homes being burned to the ground, or that they or their families will be killed if they do not vote for the ANC - little realizing or actually believing - that their ballots are secret.

 

Though there is probably no way of knowing if those issuing these low-key threats are in any way directly tied to the ANC itself, or whether this is just a form of terrifying peer-pressure from fanatical supporters, regardless, many ordinary South Africans capitulate to these threats - and this makes the outcome of recent general elections pretty much a foregone conclusion.

The Minister, The Barrister & The Thought Police

Recently the Deputy Minister of Home Affairs, Mr Gigaba, announced his intention to push legislation for censorship of the internet and also the mobile phone network, supposedly to block people from accessing pornography. 

 

I believe that aside from just affecting negatively the civil freedoms instilled in the Bill of Rights for all South Africans, this will have dire consequences for freedom of expression, and the right to access information - and the potential threat that this legislation will be made to serve a religious fundamentalist portion of South African society that has long sought to police the morality of the rest of us.

Doublethink

I recently learned of the South African government’s pandering to religious fundamentalist groups, and began warning of this threat to civil rights and freedoms as protected by the Constitution. Just this week, I saw a news article announcing further confirmation of this collusion between the Deputy Minister of Home Affairs in particular, and the religious right wing - in the form of the "Justice Alliance of South Africa" (JASA).

It reminds me of the old National-Party government and the Apartheid regime, for people to work to introduce censorship - particularly censorship based on the shaky ground of religious objection - into a modern constitutional secular democracy. In fact, to me it bears the same stink of the totalitarianism of Nazi Germany and the old Soviet Union - and in places like Zimbabwe, where it is illegal to even criticize the president.

The Justice Alliance of SA is a small fringe group of religious fundamentalists masquerading as a bona fide legal interest group - but with clear ulterior motives to further a conservative and theocratic agenda which will deprive the broader public of freedoms and liberties they now take for granted.

The Trouble With Censorship Is XX XXXX XXXXXXX

The Ministry of Home Affairs has announced plans to ban pornography on the internet. 

 

Also mentioned prominently in the article is their partner in this affair - a shadowy organization calling itself "The Justice Alliance of South Africa", which as it turns out, is a pitifully small right-wing Christian fundamentalist group which pretends to have the legal best interests of the South African public at heart, and which masquerades as a "friend to the court" whenever any legal issue related to matters of interest to the Christian hegemony appears before the bench.

This group has tried very hard to disguise the scent of Christian extremism emanating from within, with a thin veneer of legal respectability, and a spritz of eau de justice, but try as it might, the odors of religious extremism and conservative ulterior motives still linger. 

Community Building

Recently I wrote about cohesion in our pink community, and over the weekend I was again faced with the exact opposite. Some trans-women seem to feel that I have been remiss in campaigning for transgender rights and focusing only on gay rights. They feel, as I do - that there are some rather prominent advocacy groups, some of them advertising that they stand for all GLBTI rights, some not - and that these groups are abandoning trans people.

A prime examples of this is the ENDA (Employee Non Discrimination Act) in the USA, which has failed to pass in the past - and from which transgender rights were conveniently removed by some of our gay allies in order to see that the act had a "better chance" of passing. Hmm. I have to point out that (duh) this is not the act of an ally. The dust around this issue still has not settled, and I wait with bated breath to see how it goes down.

Making The Difference

I want to focus today on Africa, and African affairs. Of late, African countries all around South Africa have been flaunting an increase in their peculiar brand of homophobia, laced with ignorance - often deliberately willful ignorance - on matters of medicine, science, fact - and tasting remarkably of religious fundamentalism. 

 

Relating to this issue, an item came across my inbox today, which was forwarded to me by a friend. It was a message from an ACDP support group on Facebook, and it went as follows:

"Jo-Ann Downs May 27, 2010 at 2:28pm Subject: DRC visit

I am off to Lubumbashi in DRC tomorrow to teach about 1000 Church leaders about getting involved in improving the country. Need lots of prayer. There are so many terrible things happening to women and children I hope to really make a difference."

This of course, is where the ACDP completely crosses the line between religion and politics, and works to blur the line separating church and state as well - which it already does, simply by existing as a registered political party.

It's A Small World, After All

When Uganda recently tabled its Bill which would effectively have instituted the death penalty for homosexuality and a pink genocide, many countries applied great pressure to Uganda to drop the Bill. So far this Bill has been put on hold, yet in Uganda gay people still face an existing law which prescribes a 14-year prison term simply for being gay - just as in Malawi and several other former colonial African countries.

Malawi has just this week rewarded a gay couple with the maximum prison term for loving each other - 14 years of hard labor, a potential - and even likely death sentence in such a prison. The world has begun to apply pressure on Malawi too because of this outrageous human rights abuse, but the question remains - how much pressure will they apply, and what will happen if Malawi doesn't budge?

Hook, Line And Stinker

In a new press release in which the Family Research Council (of Focus on the Family and James Dobson infamy) dragged an eight year old "study" out of mothballs and served it up with today's sauce, they once again misrepresented scientific data to undermine human rights and promote their own fascist agenda.

"WASHINGTON, D.C. - Family Research Council released a new analytic report today showing that women who did not grow up with their biological mother and father are much more likely to engage in homosexual conduct as adults than are women who grew up in an intact family."

"Oh, goody," Some people will be thinking. "A new study to show how nasty, immoral, un-patriotic, and hostile to "the family" gay people are. And how much of a threat they pose to "our" children!"

As somebody pointed out to me, all to rightly: "Before long, phony religious right experts will be citing this study as fact. It's best to refute the lies before they have a chance to spread." And among the things recklessly promoted in this libelous and poorly researched "study" is the claim that "Women who never attend religious worship are more than three times as likely to have homosexual relationships than are women who attend worship weekly." 

 

This is exactly the sort of thing that bigot preachers will seize upon and preach from their pulpits as "gospel truth" and "fact".

Hate The Sin, Hate The Sinner

Where I come from, being called a bigot used to be an insult, and being called bigoted was an accusation people used to take very seriously. 

 

Considering that I grew up in South Africa during the last years of the Apartheid regime, and was schooled under its influence, this ought to be something of a revealing scenario.

In those days, liberals used to refer to people as bigots because they were supporting and defending racist policies, and were very enthusiastic about it. Very often, the same people used to "categorically deny" being bigoted and would take such accusations very personally while often going to extremes - very often religious extremes - to try to justify their bigotry, or to discredit the applicability of the term to themselves.

To my mind this has only served to alter the concepts of accountability and responsibility in the mindset of particularly religious conservative Christians - who tend to believe that if they believe their God, Bible or pastor directs them to hate anyone or anything - or to act out of that hate against anyone or anything, then this direction is canonical and thus absolves them of any earthly accountability or responsibility.

Sadly for them, it doesn't work that way. 

Or does it?

Alternative Healing

I was impressed by two stories this week. I know, it is only Tuesday, but I am already beginning to think it will take something pretty extraordinary to top the past few days, at least for me - and at least, in the field of human rights in South Africa. 

If My Grandma Had Wheels, She'd Be A Wagon

Immortality.

 

No, not that spiritual guff. Put your wallet back in your pocket, I'm not asking for donations. 

I'm talking about physical immortality.

Yeah. Right.

Some people, and there have been quite a few, believe that if we were supposed to live forever, we would have evolved to do so. Hmm that is an interesting proposal. Suppose that we ...eventually - er, did?  

 

Perhaps I might add that if we were supposed to travel thousands of kilometers to watch grown men from all over the planet kicking a silly little ball around, we would have evolved to include jet engines in our biology. Or, if we were meant to barrel down highways at sixty kilometers per hour, we'd have evolved some sort of organic wheels. 

 

No? 

 

Okay then - well, back to the topic of physical immortality.

Owning The 'H' Word

The "H" word. 

 

We all know it. 

 

We have all felt it. 

 

Sometimes we use it to describe traffic jams, the stuff we find on our sandwiches, the work we do, or getting up on a Monday morning. 

 

We use it so easily, but sometimes things happen to us that we can't control - things that are done to us by other people who for that moment, had control over our lives and made us feel powerless, insignificant and small. 

 

And then it is that we redirect the injury done to us by others back at them - and make it all worse.

We own the "H" word, and we eagerly claim it with both hands - not realizing that it is not us who wields it, but it which wields us.

 

The word I'm discussing here is, "hate".

Hate is bad for everybody.

Rainbow Unity

Last week I noticed for the first time that people refer to the rainbow flag as "the gay flag". I have often heard it referred to as such, but for the first time I really thought about it. Is it really?

We have quite a diverse community, consisting of gay men, gay women (or lesbians), bisexual people, transgender people (including transsexuals, drag queens, transvestites, she-males) and intersex people. There are also other sub-groups such as pansexuals, panromantics, the gender-queer and asexuals. And if you think that's all there is to us, you're mistaken. There are also some lesser-known sub-cultures within our community, such as the bear and leather groups.

And yes, while we may be gay, bisexual, transgender or intersex, we can also be part of more than one of these groups at the same time. 

What's Your Handicap?

Today I want to talk about handicaps - such as religion. And when I say "handicap", I mean in terms of driving with the handbrake still on. That's right, like having lead weights put in your pack to slow you down. Or your golfing handicap. Yes, that's a better description - because without that handicap, you could score so much higher. In fact I think that describes exactly what I mean.

Ulterior Motives

Why do South Africa's law enforcement agencies not seem to be curbing or preventing violent crime incidents plaguing us of late?

Two likely reasons come to mind:

1) Because they are really unable to curb or prevent violent crime and don't want to admit it, or

2) Because they want the country to be or at least appear to be becoming ungovernable.

Of course, one would have to really wonder why the second reason might apply... except if, for example, they might later need to "justify" a reactionary crackdown on societal or democratic freedoms.

Surely I am exaggerating? I don't know, am I?

Asking myself this question, I am confronted with several interesting facts.

At the top of the list of these interesting facts, is the detail that something like this is beginning to happen right now with the pending reintroduction of media censorship.

Rainbow Flag = Cohesion

It is a simple fact that if members of a community stop socializing together, we soon stop co-operating and standing together as well. Pretty soon we stop thinking of ourselves as being part of the same community - and not long after that, we start acting like rivals - or worse yet, enemies.

Broadening The Support Base

It seems that advocacy groups always leave somebody out somewhere. 

 

All these groups names just say "gay" and "lesbian" but few seem to include "intersex", "bisexual" or "transgender" in the name. I know the GLBTIQ etc. acronym is an ever-changing and expanding, evolving and growing royal pain in the butt, and even that omits several other emerging groups such as asexuals. We need a global name to describe the community as a whole. And we need to make sure no group gets left out - or feels left out.

For some time I have been using the term "the Pink Community" to describe us - because to me, that is all-inclusive, no matter what sub-part you belong to, if you are not strictly heterosexual or are in any way gender-variant, you can be sure that you are included in there, somewhere.

Is There Something We Can Do? Yes. There is.

There are groups in South Africa which are claiming to be able to "cure" gay people, as though human sexual orientation and gender identity is some form of disease or "lifestyle choice". Their attack on human rights and freedom of expression comes ENTIRELY from the perspective of religious conservatism and fundamentalism and has no basis in fact, reality, science or medicine whatsoever.

They claim we are "broken", burdened with "unwanted SSA" (that's "Same Sex Attraction") that we are somehow in need of their intervention, and so they believe that the same God that made us gay, bisexual or trans, has duly appointed them the moral guardians to rush to our aid and to save us from our sinful natures.

I find the fact that so many people actually fall for their nonsensical prattle rather disturbing. In fact, I think it is because of a lack of education on what we are as opposed to what they say about us.

22 Things Heterosexual Couples Take For Granted When Getting Married

Lists have been on my mind lately, so I thought I would run with it. Today's list is about things heterosexual couples can expect or take for granted when getting married:

40 Myths, Busted

I thought today I might make a short list of things that expose the shaky foundations of most stereotypical anti-gay myths being peddled by anti-equality groups. In doing so, I found a list, upon which I based my list. (You can view the original here.)

Duck Blind

It was Constantine, the false Christian and Emperor of Rome, who founded the Catholic Church. According to Catholic tradition, he supposedly saw a message in the heavens, a blazing cross in the sky, which was said to be a promise from god to give him victory in his battle for political power in the Roman Senate. "In this sign conquer" it said, and so he went off to quickly 'convert' his thousands of soldiers with a flick of his wrist and a quick sprinkle of water - and conquered his own country by violence in what was essentially a coup. 

 

It's funny how sometimes we miss the blatantly obvious, but it finally occurred to me today that "conquest" is not a Christ-like value. Neither is "evangelism" since the word literally means "waging war".

Tick Tock

As some of you may have heard by now, Media24 - the former employer of South Africa's new Ambassador (excuse, me - "High Commissioner") to Uganda - is challenging the constitutionality of section 10 of Act 4 of 2000.

'It's Okay To Say 'Gay = Stupid' - BCCSA

In yet another case in point of human rights and equality laws not being adhered to and misinterpreted according to personal bias - and made to fail those whom they were intended to protect, "The Broadcasting Complaints Commission of South Africa refused to uphold the complaint, saying that "the word gay was not used to refer to homosexuality, but according to widespread current usage of the word amongst young people, to a carefree attitude and unjustifiable statements."

Portent Pending

Unlike quite a lot of people - and in what is practically an entire industry set up around the idea of telling people how "God" wants them to live their lives - I am not qualified to say what God wants - or what God says - and I don't believe anybody else is either. 

 

In fact, all I know is what I feel and what I want and what I need - that is what it is to be human and mortal - and fallible, isn't it? Some people, I think, would do well to realize this and put down their sharpened books, get off their lofty pedestals and stop waving their fingers down at us, as though they are somehow special and have a hot line to any god at all.

There is a disturbing trend developing in parts of the modern world, to connect good morals (called "morality") and Christianity, as if people who are not fundamentalist Christians are somehow automatically exempted from being people of good moral character. 

 

Feminists, even when Christian, are described as "backsliding" or "misled" simply because they believe, somewhat controversially - that women are or should be treated as equal to their male counterparts - and thus disagree with the Patriarchy, which had appointed itself - somewhat arrogantly and presumptuously, as a middle-man between humanity and the divine.

Angus-iety Attack

Did you see the front page of Rapport yesterday? And pg 4,5 and 16, with pictures too - with Angus Buchan plastered all over them, with his "real men" and patriarchy story? I ask you: is this sort of thing news? 

 

Honestly! Is the "Rapport" a newspaper - or a church newsletter? 

 

Given all the fawning attention Rapport (and its parent, News24) lavishes on this right-wing religious extremist figure, it might as well be.

Separate ≠ Equal

A little while ago I received a response from a priest who wrote to me about the subject of marriage equality in South Africa.

I had said in an interview with Behind the Mask - and he quoted me: "'Gay people can marry, but under a separate Act, and also, without a choice of in or out of community of property, and also without the freedom of choice to have a religious ceremony or not - and as Apartheid made us all keenly aware, separate is not equal - but it certainly is separate', Engela said."

Business As Usual

President Jacob Zuma's recent visit to Uganda drew a lot of attention to South African involvement in that country - and also to the revelation that there are many South African companies which have concerns, business interests and a corporate presence in that country. Despite the ongoing human rights violations against the LGBTIQ community in Uganda - and the consistent attempts by human rights organizations to draw attention to the threat against the lives of a minority group - neither the SA government, nor one of these companies has even once taken to speaking out against these devious and sinister practices.

There are quite a few very large SA companies doing business openly in Uganda - and we can be certain that there are many more companies who support the Ugandan regime just by doing business there - and by paying taxes to the Ugandan government. Of course, you are all encouraged to search for more online and to add them to your own lists and ask others to take further action yourself.

Not Otherwise Specified

I was asked a question by a friend the other day. "How does one rid oneself of the shame surrounding sexuality as indoctrinated by church and society, and especially being different and having a secret that one cannot share?"

I think we are all influenced by the very Victorian, conservative religious stereotype while growing up - the whole concept that "sex is dirty and wrong and sinful" - despite it being 100 percent natural, normal and even healthy. 

 

The historical Victorians have often been described as being 'too afraid to see themselves naked for fear it will lead to sinful thoughts'. And while this is an amusing, even flippant thought, ironically, it is this same Victorian stereotype which still haunts former British Colonies with its presence in leftover so-called "morality" laws. Even today, many independent former British colonies are using legal systems which were built upon the preceding colonial laws - laws which regulated the sort of clothing people (especially women) could wear in public for example, or laws which criminalized homosexuality in any form - a stunning intrusion of the imperialist mindset of the former British Empire into the private lives and bedrooms of those still living under these laws in 2010! 
 

There are signs however, that these repressive and backwards leftover colonial-era laws are slowly dying a lingering death. 

 

Die already, for fuck sake!

'Family Policy Institute' - Deciding For You What You Can Or Can't Have Access To

Like me, you might not like porn - I really have other interests, and I wouldn't waste my internet bandwidth on it - but certainly don't place myself in the position where I think I should tell people what they should be allowed to do or watch in private and on their own time - as long as it doesn't hurt anyone, of course. 

 

Now, aside from murder, rape, pedophilia and grand theft, I can't think of any reason why adult porn could be harmful to anyone. 

 

In fact, I'd say that even smoking is more harmful. 

 

However, I do know that opening the door to censorship legislation opens a whole other can of worms that may prevent you from seeing, saying or even doing other things which you take for granted now - and that you may actually WANT to. 

 

And that to me is far more harmful than anything people like Erroll Naidoo spend most of every day bitching about.