Monday, May 25, 2009

The No-man's-land Of Spiritual Warfare

I object to liars tarnishing the name of gay people, reducing them to "deviants who choose to sin" and who "can change" - in turn helping to make life even harder for them.

I assure you, gay-hating pulpit-pilots could never be as sad as I am when I see inequity and deceit peddled as truth and used to destroy the lives of innocent people because of idiotic superstitions and childish spite. People who believe this rubbish should be ashamed - and as a former Christian I am ashamed of and for them.

Besides, unless you are born GLBT or I, how would you ever know the truth for yourself? And then you nice bigots display the arrogance to call me ignorant - you who wholeheartedly worship a god you have never seen or heard or seen any true evidence of.

Nobody could get better at "brainwashing" people than the church - they have been at it for 2000 years and they often get people to deny their own natures just out of fear of the machine they are well greased little cogs of.

And just because I dont buy into their religion or their method of believing anything does not mean I am not "spiritual" or don't have faith. However they usually assume that just because they don't like the facts it means they can and should turn nasty. How they deduce this hatred and intolerance could ever prove their "Christian love" for anybody is beyond me.

I repeat - how can you know something if there is no way to know it? How can you possibly trust books written and edited and mistranslated - and then even the word of others who have only read the same unreliable rhetoric and thus know as little if not less about the subject as yourself?

Quite frankly I am not interested in what other people say god is or wants or says - or what they say makes him, her or it vomit - because the truth is, NOBODY really knows. I will find out for myself - as in the end will they.

Interesting claims they make in their desperate scramble to cling to any last threads of legitimacy and godly authority in their crusade to destroy the pink community in their vaunted "culture war" - their self-proclaimed "war on homosexuality". All respect to your faith, but there is no way you can prove anything you claim - all that you can prove is that you believe it.

No people, I'm not fighting God - I'm not that arrogant or ambitious. I'm fighting against hate and bigotry and ignorance and the persecution and suffering of people like me. So we have the same freedoms as straight people? Really? How about the people who are murdered out of hate for being gay or trans? The lesbians who are "correctively raped" - or the hate people vent publicly and in the media against the pink community out of their precious "morality" - with IMPUNITY? So much for our vaunted equality.

You demand "morality", do you? - well honey, as they so rightly say - charity begins at home.

If you call standing against hate 'evil' or even 'wrong' then perhaps you are the one who has lost touch with reality and not me? I think you have lost the plot - it is in your churches and groups and basements - thickening - congealing like spilled blood.

And if there is a god, (as I sincerely hope there is) will he be standing beside people being persecuted - or with those who commit acts of hatred, especially in his own name?

They keep showing how uncompassionate they are by calling our state of being a "lifestyle" - they call it a choice - and yet any gay or trans person KNOWS there is no choice, it is who we are. And science accepts this, has even found ways of showing this to be fact - and still some refute it because it happens to challenge what nonsense they have been taught by other people with massive chips on their shoulders and social positions to maintain through blowing hot air and keeping the little ants busy to prevent the hive from falling apart through lack of giants to slay.

This is how we come into this world - and people who do not care enough to even try to understand us, condemn and perscute us out of hatred and ignorance. They see what we are as a disease or something that should not be tolerated and should be changed or stamped out at all costs. I must say that sort of outlook causes me to question what kind of a god they have faith in - or more to the point - what kind of monster they think god to be.

Yes, they are ignorant. And without compassion. God help their children if any of them happen to be gay or trans - because it seems they will not. Instead they will bombard them with intolerence, reject them or worse, pack them off to some "ex-gay" boot camp to try and bend them straight and to their will, not God's - even at serious risk to their lives.

In the end, Christianity is the lifestyle - and a choice - no more, no less.

Do not presume to tell me what I say to God, or question my faith or the state of my own heart - when they know nothing of the relationship between me and god. People claim to know all about this god - and yet they show no token of mercy, fogiveness, or tolerance of this god whom they profess to have faith in - and they delight in the sorrow and suffering they cause in others - and call it just. They set about making people so unhappy and isolated and when they crawl into a hole and pull it in after them, they have the nerve to call homosexuality a "suicidal lifestyle".

And yet they do this - and deny that any gay or trans person could ever be a "true" Christian.

If they say that gay people cannot believe as they do , then I am bound to take that as a real genuine compliment.

I have seen and tasted the hatred of people who claim the mantle of god's authority - but who do not act or speak for him - and I will never again bow before any mortal, nor feel inferior just because I happen to be different to them. The "ex-gay" rubbish these people call "science" or "Christian love for homosexuals"? I have seen it - I have tasted it - and it tastes like blood and bile. Many people have taken their own lives out of the sorrow, suffering and misery of not fitting in, of not being accepted, of trying to be what they are not born to be. Would you call that the love of a loving god? Either these people who persecute us are wrong and are acting on their own, or they are right - and god is not a just and loving father god. One of these two choices must be true. Logic.

Personally, I know what I am inside - and what I've always been, and what the fight to conform to their norms cost me - so excuse me if I prefer a loving father god instead of an ogre - and that makes people who think as they do - wrong.

Call me arrogant then, just out of sour grapes because I see through it and call it what it is - false. Call me a liar because I insist from my own experience that a man who claims to have "reformed" and "left the gay lifestyle" is a both a charlatan and a fraud who is still every bit as gay as the day he was born - and up to the day he will die. Call me a god-hating "christophobic" bigot simply for standing up against rhetoric and hate and lies employed by people who have hijacked a peaceful, loving religion and painted a loving father god as a vengeful unjust monster without any love or regard for those whom he has made.

I hope that one day those who think as they do will see the truth - because their eyes and ears are closed tight - out of fear of seeing and hearing it.

If you would like to know more about Christina Engela and her writing, please feel free to browse her website.

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