Thursday, April 30, 2009

You Are Not Alone

Nice bigot folks always seem so concerned about the youth - but never seem to care a damn about the GLBT youth who get bullied, sidelined and forced into heterosexual pigeon holes - and show nothing but intolerance, complete disregard and blatant hostility for their well-being, inborn traits and sexuality. In fact some anti-GLBT groups have even publicly advocated bullying of GLBT youth to "encourage" them to "turn straight". Instead, today we see proof that this results in tragedy, such as the spate of recent juvenile suicides across the USA.

Through their short-sightedness, intolerence and incitement to hatred these nice people have even caused heterosexual teens to commit suicide out of the misery caused by bullies who mistakenly targeted them for being gay.

It would seem that making GLBT miserable enough to end their lives is part of their strategy to justify their claim that homosexuality "is a suicidal lifestyle". Clearly the value of a GLBT life is not as high as it should be. While there are crisis call centers and suicide help lines, there are few that will address GLBT issues, or counsel a distraught gay or trans teen without trying to refer them to a so-called "ex-gay" facility to "cure them of their affliction". The level of intolerance and religious based prejudice and even ignorance out there is simply too distressing for words.

When some schools challenge this system of hate by showing the youth that there are other people among them with needs both different and yet similar to their own, these people call it "indoctrination" or "recruiting" or "promoting the homosexual lifestyle" and "breeding confusion". They criticize the dissemination of knowledge and education about human sexuality as "causing the youth to question their own sexuality and 'turn gay'". Curiously, this warped line of thought is actually supported by people like Paul Cameron who is also known for suggesting that gay people are less likely to live beyond the age of 40, are more prone to certain diseases, that HIV is a primarily gay disease, and that gay people are predominently pedophiles. These people also try unsuccesfully to discredit the scientific evidence which shows that sexuality and gender identity are inborn traits - and try to assert that it is due to how a child is raised or "exposed" to gay people. Hence, they say knowledge is bad, ignorance is good.

Are they actually suggesting that questioning the world around us is bad for a growing intelligence? Some scientists they must be indeed.

When I was at school I was "forced" to learn books full of stuff and write a lot of essays about stuff I didnt like or agree with - or found confusing. What was most confusing to me was being part of the GLBT group in a school where homophobic and nasty jokes were the norm and bullies nailed me for being feminine for half my high school career.

How I wish when I was at school that people were as open minded and tolerant and decent enough to show me the same courtesy and consideration as the schools who today include alternate sexuality and gender identity in their sex education classes! I could have had a much happier childhood being loved for who I am and for being honest about it instead of living a lie just to be safe!

Those who oppose our human rights and incite hatred against GLBT people do not know the hurdles and challenges we face - and what is more they do not even care how hard it is for us - because they seek to make it even harder and then add insult to injury by sugar coating it with religious piety and political double-talk and dismiss everyone who doesnt fit their "ideal norms" as "perverts" and "threats to civilization" over sherry and giggles.

Trouble is, these folk are so blinded by their own hatred they do not know it's taste as we do. They don't even see it as hate anymore. They have been listening to their own lies so long that they actually believe them.

I was a very shy kid when I was at school - and only much later I realized there was no need to be shy. So if I could go back and do it all over, I would be more open about who I am. I would also ask 'why' a lot more often and also employ the phrase "prove it".

I also hated myself and what I was.

And the reason I hated myself? Well there were a few different ones - I was a teenager after all, but one of them was that I thought I was gay (when I was trans) - and then I hated myself for being trans too ;) I was very religious and my own nature conflicted with what I was taught to believe, and with what I was taught was right and what wasn't.

Then one day, years later and out of school, I eventually realized I wasn't as bad as I thought I was. That I was a good person, no matter what I thought others thought about me, and that even if people hated me for who they thought I was, it didn't mean that God hated me just because they said so.

I realized that the God I believed in had created me as I am, and that he loves me as I am.

Once you realize that, you start to realize that the people who insult you, try to isolate you and turn others against you and show such mind blowing ignorance and the arrogance to still somehow call themselves "Christians" are themselves the villains in this sad little tale called life.

I have seen there are many more followers of Christ (and even other faiths) who show tolerance and love to people like us than there are those who do the opposite. The trouble is the intolerant ones are just more vocal about their hate.

Interaction with others like us strengthens us and builds our support systems so that we can be more comfortable with who we are and also to help others come to terms with who they are. Education lifts the dark veil of ignorance and fear of the unknown.

By not interacting with others like us we are helping negative forces out there to isolate us - to separate us from the herd, making us easier to pick off on our own. And that is just what they want.

Whatever you do, know that you are not alone.

If you would like to know more about Christina Engela and her writing, please feel free to browse her website.

If you’d like to send Christina Engela a question about her life as a writer or transactivist, please send an email to or use the Contact form.

All material copyright © Christina Engela, 2019.


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