Tuesday, February 2, 2010

As Good As It Gets

Some like to claim that marriage equality for gay people will "increase the divorce rate" because "everybody knows" that gay people "cannot commit" and are promiscuous. Ironically, this claim often comes from people who have been divorced themselves, or are themselves in unhappy marriages. That is for them as good as it gets - and so they judge others by their own limited knowledge or jaded standards.

The fun part is where I get to point out the old gay couple living in my area who have been together for 40 years, and although they have not married, I have to wonder how many heterosexual marriages their relationship has outlasted?

And then there is the dubious claim that homosexuality is a "suicidal lifestyle" and that "most gay people die in their 40's". If these people were to open their eyes, they would see the numerous gay people around them, who are well over their 40's. I know several personally who are well into their 60's - and the reason these folks probably aren't seen much for who they are, is because they are used to being themselves in secret. Old habits die hard, they say.

All around the world now, advocacy and human rights organizations are facing the growing need for inclusive care for the aged and frail GLBTI people who have stubbornly resisted proving the religious right accusation that "there are no GLBTI senior citizens". Wrong, buddy. They exist, everywhere. Denying this won't make them simply vanish.

Let somebody ever again say in my presence that gay people "do not love like straights do", that they are "trapped in a lifestyle choice" or "risky behavior", that gay people are only interested in sex - and that sex is all that being gay is about - and I will point out to them the numerous examples which debunk their vicious lies - that I know and have seen with my own eyes.

One example stands out head and shoulders above the rest to me - the lovely young couple I have recently become a friend to, the two guys I spent Saturday night socializing with. One is a talented musician in his early 30's and his partner is a twenty-something music teacher - both are wonderful people in their own right.

They have been together more than a year now, and were recently engaged. When they are together, their love is plain to see. Even after a year, they are lit up like strobe lights, and are tender and loving to each other, and are such a sweet sight to behold. I have seen love in my friends many times, straight or gay - and let me tell you right now, that this is something unique and special that you don't see often. They really do have love, they really are happy.

This is the ideal to which all people aspire, no matter what their sexual orientation or gender. It just goes to show that love knows no race, no gender, no religion, no sexual orientation. Love is love, and for most of us, this is as good as it gets.

Be happy out there, live to the fullest, love to the max - whoever you are.


If you would like to know more about Christina Engela and her writing, please feel free to browse her website.

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